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Struggling to get sober.

  • johnathon.balderas
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  • Stay humble and thank God everyday for waking up.
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09 Dec 2020 14:22 #45026 by johnathon.balderas
Struggling to get sober. was created by johnathon.balderas
Not many know I'm an alcoholic due to being able to manage it well. I don't drink everyday mostly weekends and when I do its at night where I can manage it due to everyone being asleep. I dont even drink liquor only beer. I don't hide it though my wife knows. I used to never understand addiction I had never gone through it. When i used to smoke pot in high school I just stopped.

I feel cursed with this. Might be a generational curse passed down from my mom. She is an alcoholic as well and she garners alot of attention due to her behavior. I feel alone in this sometimes due to no one having gone through this except my mom. But she is unreliable due to being drunk half the time. My dad is an ex drug addict/alcoholic but his addiction was more extreme than mine and he seems to dismiss my struggles.
That's not his fault though. So much is going on with my little family we are struggling financially and its not helping my addiction. Sorry for this jumbled mess of words I just have alot going on in my head and need to vent
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09 Dec 2020 15:48 #45028 by Chad
Replied by Chad on topic Struggling to get sober.
Strength to you, brother. If you have the desire, when the time is right, you will make the change. It won't be easy. But, you can do it. :) I believe, the time is near. ;)


12 years sober, and counting.

"Knowledge is a weapon. Arm yourself, well, before going to do battle."
"Understanding a question is half an answer."

I have learned more by being wrong, than I have by being right. :)
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09 Dec 2020 18:13 #45032 by Tutti57
Replied by Tutti57 on topic Re:Struggling to get sober.
Hang in there. Times are tough now, so I'm sure that's not helping any. If you feel that you need help, when you are ready, reach out to a local group for some assistance. There are online options now where you can meet with a counselor through video chat at your convenience too.



Nissan Tech
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11 Dec 2020 16:19 #45078 by Noah
Replied by Noah on topic Re:Struggling to get sober.
Addiction is a real mother fucker
I had to make HUGE mistakes to realize that I had a problem.
Thankfully I survived and learned from my mistakes. I've lost very close loved ones to addiction, add it fucking hurts every day.
I'm not exactly a roll model, but if you need to talk you can PM me.

-Seems to me that I could live my life, a lot better than I think I am.
I guess that's why call me The Working Man.-
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13 Dec 2020 07:51 - 13 Dec 2020 07:54 #45120 by Andy.MacFadyen
Replied by Andy.MacFadyen on topic Struggling to get sober.
Having had an alcoholic mother myself I get where you are coming from and where you are.
We are the products of our genes but we are gifted with free will, not always easy in fact most times dammed it is tough but when we are in a bad place we can find our way out. As an older guy looking back on life I made good decisions, bad decisions, some for good reasons some for selfish reasons. Just try and be the best person you can be, don't blame yourself for where you are look to the future and be determind to find a way to a brighter life.

The artist Frida Kahlo wrote " At the end of the day we can endure much more than we think we can."

" We're trying to plug a hole in the universe, what are you doing ?. "
(Walter Bishop Fringe TV show)



Last edit: 13 Dec 2020 07:54 by Andy.MacFadyen.
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20 Jan 2021 10:11 #46058 by fall7rise8
Replied by fall7rise8 on topic Struggling to get sober.
An alcoholic friend told me he found some help at intherooms.com.
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10 Feb 2021 11:11 #46672 by Weycraze
Replied by Weycraze on topic Struggling to get sober.
You don't have to struggle my friend. Get your butt to an AA meeting. You CAN NOT 'fix' this by yourself. It takes a recovering Alcoholic/Addict to 'fix' the suffering ones. Period. You are NOT alone by any stretch. Reach out for that help and never look back!!!!

Your already half-way there, you admit your an Alcoholic, that's Step One. Seek help my friend, you'll be surprised by the amazing people you're gonna meet!!!

In my personal case, if it wasn't for Jesus Christ, AA, I would still be suffering.

Signed,

Sober 10 years (I'm gonna catch up to Chad!!!)

Paul
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